"though we could fool each other, we should consider"
What are the wonders of being honest?
A Ritual to Read to Each Other
by William Stafford
If you don’t know the kind of person I am
and I don’t know the kind of person you are
a pattern that others made may prevail in the world
and following the wrong god home we may miss our star.
For there is many a small betrayal in the mind,
a shrug that lets the fragile sequence break
sending with shouts the horrible errors of childhood
storming out to play through the broken dyke.
And as elephants parade holding each elephant’s tail,
but if one wanders the circus won’t find the park,
I call it cruel and maybe the root of all cruelty
to know what occurs but not recognize the fact.
And so I appeal to a voice, to something shadowy,
a remote important region in all who talk:
though we could fool each other, we should consider—
lest the parade of our mutual life get lost in the dark.
For it is important that awake people be awake,
or a breaking line may discourage them back to sleep;
the signals we give – yes or no, or maybe—
should be clear: the darkness around us is deep.
“A Ritual to Read to Each Other” by William Stafford, from The Way It Is: New and Selected Poems © Graywolf Press.
Gif: public domain image from WW2 air training schools in Huron County, Ontario, Canada digitized by Emily Beliveau
Creative Invitations
When I am uncertain what to do or say, I can rely on this poem. If I recite it or read it silently to myself, I can remember my compass / my post / my center / my signal.
If I’ve been tempted to tell half a truth, or stray from the course a hair and hope no one notices, or steal thunder, or forget thanks, Stafford’s poem reminds me: “elephants parade holding each elephant’s tail, but if one wanders the circus won’t find the park.”
I want to trust the one ahead of me, whose tail I hold, and know s/he is of pure heart and steady footstep. I want the elephant behind me to be safe and know that I will do my best to step right. I want to be an elephant whose tail you can hold with your trunk and trust you’d be led to the park, because we are a family circus (the cruelty-free kind).
If your heart is awake and loving patterns, send out a signal.
If your heart feels cracked or stunned because of cruelty, aggrieved at people following the wrong god home, or like an egg leaking its yolk, return to your signals. Make them bright and clear in the night. Write a message here; we will hear it.
Questions to Consider
Whose tail do you hold? Who are you led by?
Who holds your tail in their trunk? Who is led by you?
What signal could you give clearly, today, to shine your light deeper into the deep darkness?
Whose tail do I hold + who hold mine? Such lovely prompts